This morning I sat down to text a friend of mine. It started getting long, and I realized it was turning into a blog post, as do many of my journal entries or emails.
Sometimes I feel my heart and mind connect, or open up, or tap into some greater energy, and I see people and situations with incredible clarity, as if I have just left my body and am looking down from above. Such was the case with this text-turned blog post.
I am sharing this with you, beautiful souls, in case there is someone who needs it today.
If you are like most people in the world, you probably haven't been told who you are by the people in your life.
Many think they know who you are. And some of them feel it their duty to teach you who you are.
But, oh, my friends, no one can teach you who you are. Only you can discover that.
As we grow up and develop our self concept and sense of worth, we subconsciously internalize messages from those around us.
Sadly a lot of times we hear from people, the media, etc (although not always intended): "You're not worthy", "You're weak," "You're not good enough," "You'll never succeed," "You're immature," "You're a rebel," "You are boring," "You're too fat to be beautiful," etc.
These negative messages become our "inner critic" into adulthood. Our brain relies on this inner programming to keep us safe from potential "danger." It guards us from the edge of our comfort zone. Every time we make decisions, it loudly warns: "Don't do that, you will screw it up," "You are not attractive enough to date him/her," "You're not smart enough to start a business," etc. Somehow it's a lot easier to believe negative messages about ourselves than positive ones...
Even as we become adults, many of us get messages of conditional love or acceptance from the very people who raised us:
"I love you no matter what...but... if you don't do what I say, I will withhold my love."
"Because I do not understand your choices, I cannot accept you as part of my life."
"You are not capable of deciding what is best for you. Only I know what is best for you."
People label us and judge us based on their perceptions and the strength of their connection to their own true selves. But it is not based on the truth of who WE are.
So if other people can't tell us who we are, then how can we know who we are?
Are we our jobs? Our cars, houses, marital status? Our bodies, the color of our hair, or skin? The way we talk? Our disabilities or limitations? Our accomplishments?
Someone once reassured me as I was preparing to enter college, that I could always feel good about myself because of my past accomplishments (I think they were referring to: drama awards, musicals/plays I had done, etc).
Somehow that concept seemed a little off to me. Why would my past accomplishments give me high self-esteem for life?
I recently realized that none of those external parts of me are really WHO I AM.
That's because the external parts of us are only a reflection of our CURRENT understanding of our true selves.
Take a moment and close your eyes. Put your hand over your heart. Breathe. Feel your breath going in and out. Stay there for a minute, present with yourself. Aware of your own unique consciousness.
How often do you take the time to connect with your own energy?
That energy, the one you just connected with? That is your core essence. The same core that you were born with.
In every moment of your life, you were always you.
Your understanding of yourself changed, as people began to relate to you in different ways. But you, your core, never changed. That little girl or boy is still inside you.
The trick is letting all the messages from others fall away, and connecting with the true, limitless potential inside each of us.
So, the question is...who are you, really?